Doing what families do best...

Doing what families do best…

You cant live with them, you cant live without them…so true of all relationships, families included. Get off the plane and into an argument, a bit unnerving when you’re in self-obsessed mode even though the argument is about not having called home enough…arrive home and get into another argument…this time about not eating enough…Its funny that the people who care about you the most are also the people who are the most intrusive. Is this culturally motivated? ‘Actions speak louder than words’ they say…what if it’s a mixture of the two? Loud actions and even louder words? The underlying factor though is always love and concern…how can one resent that?

Family meals, another classic battle ground…all the cousins, nephews and nieces arrive. Wonder where the ‘mute’ button is? Everyone wants to know what everyone is up to. But no one wants to listen. Yes we all love the sounds of our own voices. Dishes passed around,, compliments to the cook, seconds and sometimes thirds while talking about diets. Plates cleared, appetites satiated, faith in relationships restored …

Goldfish or elephants…never the twain shall meet
I think it’s a phenomenon that afflicts those with kids and those without. The one’s with, are the goldfish and for all the right reasons. There’s way too much to occupy them than petty arguments that happened over things that one cant recall anymore. Then there’s the one’s without, who, for some reason never forget .. or forgive as the case may be. Maybe there is some virtue in having children after all…

Weddings or the lack of
Weddings …a time of celebration and more importantly, reunions. They crawl out of the wood work, relatives you haven’t seen for years. Close family come loaded with gifts and good cheer. Then theres the occasional scandal or two. Where are the bride and groom? Who cares! Indian weddings are an event that’s more for the family then for the people getting married…as long as they show up, that’s what counts. If they decide to pull a runner then its even better because the wedding will go down in the history books. The battle for bathrooms, bed rooms and cars is never ending…its all about seniority and intimidation…the older or scarier you are…the better the chances…

Bone collectors
Muslim weddings are famed for Biryani and bad manners. The concept of eating in a plate and not around it is still alien. Enter the bone collectors…you know they’ve come and gone because of the huge collection of bones piled next to the plate. Then theres the gate crashers…there is something called a free meal in India. Its quite easy to become a part of a 1000 strong audience as long as you look like a Christmas tree

Smile like you mean it
The bride and groom are strategically placed on a stage while a constant stream of guests climb up to the podium, stand next to the couple and get their photographs taken. Finger up means yes take the photograph, finger down means, don’t bother, they’re not worth the paper its going to be printed on. The gifts pile up…lava lamps to china you’ll never use. Its all in the giving and the receiving ...smile like you mean it. So that’s smile x1000 people = lock jaw. 99% of who you don't know or probably wont care about in ..give and take ..5 minutes. Guess thats what happens in a country of 1.8 billion, 1000's just a ...drop in the ocean ...

For better of worse, you choose your friends and not your family...I'm sure there's some method to the madness. I love mine with all my heart ... Here today, gone tomorrow...lets live, love and laugh with all we've got...that my friends is called gaining perspective ..finally!